Never Let Anybody Use You & Your Kind Heart

Have you been in a situation where you are always the one giving in? Have you always been one that says yes to everything, but in return people shrug you off and do not even budge with you and your requests? I cannot even count how many times It has happened to me in the past several months. On facebook a lot of people want me to advertise, and promote events and everything, but in return when I ask them to advertise and share my blog and my fanpage a writer named Talin Orfali, all I get is a no or not helping me. I believe everything is both ways. I know I have not responded to messages and comments, but I will get to them and I will work on replying as soon as I free up a whole day to do so, but anyway, I am so tired of people using me and not acknowledging me. It is the worst feeling ever to me and not appreciating and supporting me is even worse.

Never let people use you and never let people take advantage of you. You gotta learn to say no once in a while. Just to see the reaction. Well, I am going to say no to people from now on. If they do not pull their weight and advertise my stuff, then no advertising for them. It is a two way street right? Not a one way street. Don’t be a victim of another persons using. Its one of the worst feelings ever. You do not need people who use you. Stay away from them. If it doesn’t benefit them, they do not care one bit. If they don’t care, I am not going to care, if they don’t pull their weight, I won’t. It is that simple. People always want to look out for their self-growth, and self-centeredness, not how the person feeling used feels. When you start feeling used, do not keep it inside you, address the issue to the person and say, hey until when am I going to bail you out? Until when am I going to keep doing this? Saying no is not a bad thing. Trust me. Its a true test to see who stood behind with you and who left.

Just a word to the wise, don’t be a victim and do not let others use your heart and your goodness. All the best to you all! You all are my Internet family, I want the best for everyone!

14 thoughts on “Never Let Anybody Use You & Your Kind Heart

    Never let people use you and never let people take advantage of you. You gotta learn to say no once in a while.

  2. Firstly I thank you for your visit and Follow at art rat cafe, I am honoured. This post is strong – yes, it takes much experience to be able to discriminate. I have explored your site a little and am impressed by your writing – keep on keeping on…

  3. Christmas 2010 I helped out a very sick friend who had had to give up work. Her (now ex) partner was freeloading pond life and he wasn’t pulling his weight financially – so I stepped in and did an enormous Asda shop for her – it took her months to eat it all! I didn’t mind because I know she would do the same for me, and the fact that she actually got to have a Christmas that year was the only thanks I needed from her (I got to see photos of her Christmas dinner table groaning under the weight of all the lovely food and it was an amazing feeling to know that she wanted to share my one small act of kindness with the rest of the world). However, she is treating me to a Spa soon because she is wonderful.

    Another friend, on finding out that my grandmother had left me quite a good inheritance, kept asking to borrow money, but I always refused because the day after she begged me she’d be bragging about a new video game or iPhone or something. I can’t justify an iPhone – she has three kids and doesn’t work, so why is she getting herself into debt with a catalogue (who have now closed her account for non-payment) for things she doesn’t actually need? If it had been an unavoidable debt through genuine poverty and trying to keep a roof over her head I would have stepped in, but I’m not going to help somebody dig themselves an even deeper hole.

    Sometimes you really do just have to grit your teeth and put your foot down.

  4. My entire life story is about giving too much. I did not know how to balance compassion with wisdom. The word “no” is a complete sentence. It has been a hard lesson. I gave away almost everything I had so that people would feel good. I almost woke up too late. Give without an expectation of getting something in return. Do not give something to manipulate another or covet another. Sales and marketing is just that. Marketers are not your friend. They are out and about on the web looking for customers. When they get a fish, they bite.

  5. Saying no is sometimes necessary and ESP in the world of advertising and knowing who is using you and who is not. Ur posts are always introspective and well said and hopefully the right people will continue to be drawn to your blog 🙂

  6. Interesting post, it always makes me smile when I see someone that’s self-developing. The sad thing, or cynical thing however you’d like to view it, is that just about everyone can be/is a user in the right circumstances…

  7. This is certainly something I think everyone an relate to at some point of their lives. It’s takes a lot of strength at times to say no. Especially when you are a naturally giving person. The empowerment that ‘no’ can give you however is something not to be lost. As I read in another comment on here, never mistake kindness for weakness. Thanks for following my blog too, it’s allowed me the chance to read your post here and I look forward to reading more!


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