Have you ever been in a situation or several of them where there are people in your life that put words in your mouth, that dictate you and your every move and whatever you say? Do some people in one’s life tend to assume all the time about you, about what you are feeling, what you are or not interested in and who to speak to, who not to talk to, who to accept as a friend, who not to accept as a friend. I am sure in one point in our lives it has happened, and sometimes you cannot control it and sometimes you can be afraid to retaliate. In my life, I have had several people do that to me, they make my decisions for me, they decide what I have to say, what I have to do, who to be friends with, who not to be friends with. I mean we all have personal issues behind closed doors to deal with and what human being doesn’t have problems? I am sure we all do, and there are people who do not accept that and end up dictating your life because you have such a soft heart, always accepting of everyone, regardless of anything.
People then assume that you are not interested in something, where you are interested, then people start putting words in your mouth and then you are stuck in the middle and confused about it. I have been through this many times and I said this is the last time I will let anybody make my decisions for me. I am an adult now, and old enough to do that, and I will not let anybody else tell me what to feel, tell me what to do, tell me what to say, and then again I fall for it, and then at the end I suffer for it. Well, this time it is iron clad, I will not be letting others walk all over me. Yes although sometimes it is great to assist people, and care about what people do in their lives and how they live their lives, and who they talk to, or whatever, and it is great to see people genuinely care and everything which is awesome, but then again you shouldn’t let people overpower you all the time. You are an individual, and there is going to come a time where ultimately the decisions that you make you have to do it yourself. You have to develop independence, you have to develop a self of being just you, and you making whatever decision that reflects you.
Sometimes we make choices in life that we are not proud of and we all make mistakes, we all sometimes get vulnerable in certain situations, but if it is something that you don’t learn from and you keep making the same mistakes day in and day out, then that is a course of concern. Stand up for yourself, even if it means standing alone. When you are deciding something as a group, when its something that is a mutual agreement, mutual understanding, and mutual decisions or decisions as a team and if you all are on the same page on something than that is great, but then when you are not on the same page, and you know in your heart it’s not such a great decision made, then that means that you should speak up and be heard. If it means that you lose those friends, that means they weren’t your true friends to begin with, so I would rather stand alone then have people make decisions for me.
Assumptions are a big hazard and it can destroy friendships, relationships and bonds and you have to be very careful when you assume things on other people, it can backfire on you and you will not have a great outcome on it. The next time someone decides to dictate you and what you have to say about something or acting on something, just tell them kindly, you know I appreciate your willingness, and your strong personality and telling me what to do, and what to say, and being forced into things, but I am going to have to disagree with you and tell you my feelings and my thoughts on this certain situation. the point I am trying to make is that don’t let others force you into things that your heart and mind are not into, and don’t let others force you how to feel, what to say, what to do. Ultimately it is your life and how to deal with it, and don’t let others ever govern your life. Stay away from people like that. You will know who your true friends are and you will know who sticks behind you 100% when that happens. Just think about it, and go with the flow.
I am always here for everyone, and I am always here to help you on your journey, give advice, and hopefully give great advice that you will take with you in your life span. All the best to you and remember, you are you, and don’t let others tell you otherwise. I wish you all the best.
Love this one. I’m slowly learning to deal with people like this in my life. I’m standing up for myself and addressing conflict instead of ignoring it. No more. I also don’t let their opinion of ME affect ME.
I feel this one, sadly. Have a wonderful day Talin Orfali! 🙂
other peoples assumptions are so easy to internalise and act upon, when in reality they are baseless and at the very least harmful to you. We all know who we are deep down, and if we aren’t being that person we have to ask why, and make it happen.
We are who we are, and that is awesome.
Yeah – the toughest thing to do is cut the negative people from your life. Sometimes you feel as if you’ll be losing your friends and family but if these same people are making you feel negative, putting words in your mouth, or making you feel inadequate – the best thing to do is walk away. Excellent Post.
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