When people who do not know the definition of appreciating you (me), or even think about you (me ) and only approach you (me ) only if they need something done, or anything from you (me), do not worry, what goes around comes around. Let nature take its course.
I always say this, people who are far away are always sweeter than the ones who are near and the ones who are near always get used, get volunteered into things, and expect so much more from, thinking you have time and can do things quickly. Unfortunately that is how it is. People do not realize I have feelings too, and I have so much going on for me too.
I am not complaining about doing things for others, and going out of my way to do so, but there is only so much you can do and then not be appreciated for it is absolutely hurtful.
This past week and for a while now, I have been so hurt beyond repair, my heart is aching so badly, to the point where I think about what happened when I go to bed, when I am sleeping, when I wake up, when I am going about my day, when I babysit, during when I am working, and even during my happy moments where I try to take it out of my mind. It is still there. I cried for many days and I have been so upset, disappointed on how people can be this way to others, especially if they are your own flesh in blood or whoever they are. It absolutely hurts like crazy. I really do not want to discuss what happened, but it hurts emotionally and mentally. It killed any spirit that I have left.
Its not so much about being chosen to be part of something precious and beautiful, it is the principle behind it and something to show gratitude, but unfortunately some people are not gifted with being thoughtful, and being appreciative toward others.
Well, I am not doing it anymore. Not going to allow others take advantage of me and take me for a fool. I really do not have time and energy for it anymore. Time to look after myself and go after what makes me happy, be with those who appreciate, love me for who I am, what I am passionate about and what I love to do with my own time. I have put my foot down. I am so tired of crying and being so hurt. Enough is enough.
Talin Orfali Ghazarian 