My Biggest Emotional & Mental Fear

Have you ever been in a situation where you fear about what happens when you communicate with best friends or good friends everyday and you tell each other everything and never keep anything from each other, then all of a sudden that everyday communication, hanging out, and that togetherness stops? I cannot even begin to tell you how many times that has happened to me. In the past year, it has happened to me with a few people and this is my biggest emotional and mental fear when people you talk to on a daily basis and tell you everything and I tell them everything and all of a sudden the communication stops. That petrifies me so much. I love my friends so much, I love who they are, appreciate who they are and what they stand for, and I enjoy communicating with them, and I enjoy everything. I just do not understand how it can just stop just like that. Sometimes It is mutual and sometimes people stop talking to each other because there maybe nothing else to share in life, it can be due to people getting bored of each other. You never know what the case maybe. You never know what can happen in another persons life in their family life, or something may have happened to them that they don’t talk to anybody anymore. There can be a lot of factors in it.When I have always been nice and helpful, when I always give that person attention and have them talk about life and what happens, and I always try to give it my all and I always try to give time to my friends, but I guess it is not enough time isn’t it?

I always say people will come and go in life, but it is the true ones that stay in the end. This is one of my biggest emotional and mental fears in life. I have never been so scared about anything else in my life than this. I am looking forward to the new chapter in my life and I am looking forward to new experiences and new friends who don’t stop communicating and who are true and pure. I’d like to thank those people actually, they made me a stronger individual and they made me realize big things in life which taught me valuable lessons in life not to put my trust in every person I meet, to get to know people very well before I can put my trust in them, and not everyone will be my friend. Those are very important factors in life and I am so glad to have learned all that. It is very important. I am thankful to people whom have been lessons in life. Some people come into your life as blessings, some come as lessons to learn in life and that is one awesome thing to do. Live and learn as they say right? It is the same thing bottom line. Life is a never ending learning process between differentiating people, and learning about things in life and educating yourself with types of people. It is very important to know these things. What are your fears? All the best to you all!

When something from your past comes back to Haunt you.

Do you ever feel about a terrible experience or a terrible thing from your past comes back to haunt you? Such as when you have forgotten or have no though of that terrible situation you were in and all of a sudden it comes back to you? Well, several days ago I experienced deja vu all over again. Something that I do not ever want to go through ever again. I finally knew who my true friends were from all the fiasco that occured.

I could not stop crying inside of me. I did not want to show my tears in front of people, but I was crying so hard. I always try to stay strong and have a smiling face, but sometimes I just cannot help a tear or two or three in that case. I just hope that I will never go through what I went through and I do not wish that upon anybody else who I love and care about.

Since several days ago I haven’t been my full usual self. I have been cranky, and I have been lashing out at a couple of people and suddenly have no interest in interaction and being talkative because of that issue.

In conclusion and on the bright side of it all a few friends of mine, who I will like to keep anonymous and they know who they are really helped me out in that situation and I will forever be greatful to them and I love you guys and never forget it.

I hope my luck will change soon and I hope everything will be back to normal again, but its so difficult. Especially for me. I just want to be accepted for the person I am and the person I carry out to be. I don’t want to be a person people feel sorry for. I just want to be happy again.

It’s Christmas Eve!

Today I am going to keep my message short and sweet. I’d like to wish you all a very Merry Christmas and a Joyous, Healthy Happy New year 2012. Happy Holidays!

All the best to you and your family and may life be be wonderful.

What are your traditions during the holidays? What are your favourite foods during the holidays? What are your beverage choices? Not the regular Egg Nog type of things….

ENJOY!!!!

Love,

Talin