My Sweet 16 Birthday that Never happened

When I was in high school and about to turn 16, I have heard about the sweet 16’s birthday parties and the fun those people had, and planned their birthdays that it was perfect, the people who had gone to those parties, the decorations, the planning all kicked off perfectly.

Even though I did not have friends back in the day, and those who I thought were somehow, I decided to throw a sweet 16 birthday party for me. As I had invited 20 people from my school. So now when it came toward the last couple of days to my birthday, I assured people to ask if they are going to be attending my birthday and they said yes we will be there. I got so excited. I remember it was April 28, 2001, on a Saturday and Monday is my real birthday on the 30th, and decided to have it 2 days early because of School on the right day.

As I had begun decorating, and had ordered the cake and the food, as well has putting some games so people can play. As the time was nearing for people to come, I got so excited that I stood by the door to wait for them to come, my anticipation was growing deeper. As I looked at the time again and it was 2pm where the time said on the invitations, I look at the clock and it said 2:15. I said ok its ok, they are running late. Then one person came around 2:30, I welcome her into the house and she decided to wait with me. then it became almost 4pm, and it was just her and I was devastated, humiliated, embarrassed, and crying so much.

That one girl who came to my party wiped my tears away and said it will be ok. Don’t worry, I am here. lets enjoy together. Who cares about the rest that stood you up? I said yeah you are right. So we enjoyed the food, and desert and cake and watched a couple of movies until it was time for her to go home. She hugged me and said, Talin, do not worry about anybody else, they are cowards. God is watching them. Then she left as her mom came and picked her up. My heart shattered to pieces. It was a feeling that I never wish on anybody else.

After her leaving, I let out a huge cry. I said, I cannot believe this happened to me and my mom comforted me and told me, don’t worry God will punish them. So Monday came and I was still crying and devastated. I did not enjoy my real 16th birthday, but I did go out to dinner with my family, which made everything better. I actually skipped school for a couple of days and just stood home. I just didn’t feel like seeing anybody. Then I decided to go to school on the Wednesday, and none of them said I am sorry and did not bother to give me an explanation as to why they did that. All the planning, food and everything went to waste, however we kept the food and ate it throughout the week.

From then on, I didn’t care about interacting with anybody and I just went about and studied, did my homework, attended all my classes, and then once school was finished, I’d never waste another second and just go home. I was so disgusted. That one girl changed schools the year after because her family had moved somewhere further, and that really made me even cry more. She was the only one who really cared. It was so nice of her. I still have the give she gave me 14-15 years later.

As I reached another milestone this year. At the end of April on the 30th of 2015, I will be celebrating my champagne birthday turning 30 on 30 and it is coming up so quickly. As I almost say Goodbye to my 20’s, I am truly hoping that I can have a sweet 30th birthday that will make up for the sweet 16th birthday I never had. I know it is not good to expect it, but when you’ve never had a birthday party reaching a milestone, it makes you wonder how and what might have been. I just want to have a great time with my lovely and beautiful loved ones I have in my life which really matter to me more than anything else.

Have you experienced a disappointing turnout at a party or function you have had? I am sure you felt humiliated and distraught. Have you had a similar situation where people didn’t bother to show up and not telling you why and not having the common decency to call and explain? If you have, I am so sorry to hear that. I know exactly how you feel. It is not a good feeling at all.

Hopefully nobody has to go through what I went through. Best wishes to you and may your dreams come true, because everyday is our birthday and celebrate it by the gift of breathing and living through another day. We are blessed and that is what matters the most.

Ways that We Can End The Cycle of Bullying

Since I was a child up until High School, I was emotionally and mentally bullied and I know what it is like to be hurt so badly, being put down, always making fun of me because I was different then everyone else and it was the most toughest times of my life. I didn’t have friends, I didn’t have what others had when they were with each other in groups when I felt left out and being an outcast 99.9% of the time. They were moments that I will never forget, no matter if I have moved on or not. It sticks with you, however I have learned to live past it and began doing positive things in life, to move forward and to stop dwelling on the past. I have been taking a lot of new approaches to this matter and I am going to begin my own social group where people come together from all walks of life and make new friends, interact with others and just figure things out, hear other peoples perspectives on social issues.

There is always a solution and some form of ways to end this terrible cycle going on. Bullying is a very serious problem and it does need to be rectified as soon as possible. It is enough of torment, disgusting behavior that needs to be addressed quickly before it escalates even further.

Now here are ways that we can all come forward to end bullying:

– Creating small, intimate, or large social groups amongst you’re community for those who want to make friends and gather together to create a lovely group of individuals who can relate to one another, creating activities, discussing issues, doing fun, interactive, communication, group work.

– In this modern day society the importance of making it a mandatory course/subject that must be taken and taught in schools and institutions, also the workforce on the prevention of bullying, cyber bullying, social media safety, communications course which should teach students/workers what not to do, what not to say to their fellow peers/colleagues.

– Teachers, Parents, Guardians, School Guidance Staff, School Principals, and as well as outside of school grounds must always be involved in securing our schools, Implementing tougher penalties, more 0 Tolerance in Schools and also the workforce of any type of bullying that should not be allowed, suspension and expulsion.

– tell a person you trust about your feelings, what you are going through and never keep it inside you. Always tell someone you can confide into. Do not wait long to tell someone. In fact tell someone right away.

– Advocate and be proactive in this issue, write to your local papers, attend meetings, start a blog, use social media as a powerful tool to send messages, hashtags globally and come up with your own ways to prevent bullying

– Read up on inspirational quotes, save them on your computer, print them out and scatter positive, happy quotes where you can see them easily, and begin the journey to a happy road ahead.

– Always surround yourself with positivity, good people, do happy things for yourself, and stay away from negativity.

We are on the right road and path to make bullying history, and to look forward to a positive, happy and bright tomorrow. So start today, you can make a difference in someone’s life. No matter how old they are. Bullying has no age as it happens to kids, teens, young adults, youth, adults, and the elderly. Lets end this cycle now.

— If you have more ways to prevent bullying, write them below in the comments section. Thank you.

The Beginning of My Own Social Group of Positivity

Hi Everyone,

This has been on my mind for quite a while now, Every 2 weeks in the Toronto Area GTA(Greater Toronto Area), I want to gather a group together to discuss modern day issues, social issues, those who have been bullied, struggling with second guessing things and not being able to trust easily, How no one is perfect and making mistakes in our lives in social issues is proof that you are trying and bettering yourself for the present and for the future.

The purpose of this group is to strive for courage, positivity, growth and optimism about life, building confidence in speaking out, getting together to make new friends, meeting people from different paths in life and getting to know each other, accepting each other for who each person is, to share ideas and more.

I am not perfect as I have made mistakes too, however those mistakes should not define who a person is, because in the end we’re human. Life is too short to dwell on past mistakes. Especially in social settings. You live and learn. Thoughts on Moving forward, learning lessons in life, reading encouraging, inspirational quotes, and discussing about the deeper meaning to them. being positive and moving on with life is very important as were heading to that direction. Not backwards.

In the coming weeks, I will be working on setting up a place to gather around, which day to gather and so on and so forth. So if you are in the Toronto, Canada area and vicinity and would like to join in, would love to have you and to meet you. This is very important to me, I am passionate about making a better tomorrow for everyone, and gathering people together is what it is all about. I am anticipating, looking forward to a great turn out of people, and to make a difference.

 

Check back soon on the dates, times and the location of the gathering.

Hopefully I will get to meet some of my readers as well.

What are your thoughts? Do you think its a great idea to meet every 2 weeks? Or should this be a weekly event?