Have you ever been in a situation or several of them where there are people in your life that put words in your mouth, that dictate you and your every move and whatever you say? Do some people in ones life tend to assume all the time about you, about what you are feeling, what you are or not interested in and who to speak to, who not to talk to, who to accept as a friend, who not to accept as a friend. I am sure in one point in our lives it has happened, and sometimes you cannot control it and sometimes you can be afraid to retaliate. In my life, I have had several people do that to me, they make my decisions for me, they decide what I have to say, what I have to do, who to be friends with, who not to be friends with. I mean we all have personal issues behind closed doors to deal with and what human being doesn’t have problems? I am sure we all do, and there are people that do not accept that and end up dictating your life because you have such a soft heart, always accepting of everyone, regardless of anything.
People then assume that you are not interested in something, where you are interested, then people start putting words in your mouth and then you are stuck in the middle and confused about it. I have been through this many times and I said this is the last time I will let anybody make my decisions for me. I am an adult now, and old enough to do that, and I will not let anybody else tell me what to feel, tell me what to do, tell me what to say, and then again I fall for it, and then at the end I suffer for it. Well, this time it is iron clad, I will not be letting others walk all over me. Yes although sometimes it is great to assist people, and care about what people do in their lives and how they live their lives, and who they talk to, or whatever, and it is great to see people genuinely care and everything which is awesome, but then again you shouldn’t let people overpower you all the time. You are an individual, and there is going to come a time where ultimately the decisions that you make you have to do it yourself. You have to develop independence, you have to develop a self of being just you, and you making whatever decision that reflects you.
Sometimes we make choices in life that we are not proud of and we all make mistakes, we all sometimes get vulnerable in certain situations, but if it is something that you don’t learn from and you keep making the same mistakes day in and day out, then that is a course of concern. Stand up for yourself, even if it means standing alone. When you are deciding something as a group, when its something that is a mutual agreement, mutual understanding, and mutual decisions or decisions as a team and if you all are on the same page on something than that is great, but then when you are not on the same page, and you know in your heart its not such a great decision made, then that means that you should speak up and be heard. If it means that you lose those friends, that means they weren’t your true friends to begin with, so I would rather stand alone then have people make decisions for me.
Assumptions are a big hazard and it can destroy friendships, relationships and bonds and you have to be very careful when you assume things on other people, it can backfire on you and you will not have a great outcome on it. The next time someone decides to dictate you and what you have to say about something or acting on something, just tell them kindly, you know I appreciate your willingness, and your strong personality and telling me what to do, and what to say, and being forced into things, but I am going to have to disagree with you and tell you my feelings and my thoughts on this certain situation. the point I am trying to make is that don’t let others force you into things that your heart and mind are not into, and don’t let others force you how to feel, what to say, what to do. Ultimately it is your life and how to deal with it, and don’t let others ever govern your life. Stay away from people like that. You will know who your true friends are and you will know who sticks behind you 100% when that happens. Just think about it, and go with the flow.
I am always here for everyone, and I am always here to help you on your journey, give advice, and hopefully give great advice that you will take with you in your life span. All the best to you and remember, you are you, and don’t let others tell you otherwise. I wish you all the best.
Does this mean that you’re going to start reading the blogs you follow and leave/respond to comments? Not trying to be nasty, but a little interaction from you would be nice.
I do engage in other peoples blogs.
When? I can’t remember the last time anybody I know even got a “like” from you.
Also, this comment doesn’t show up as a reply in my messages, but that could be WP playing up – I know it has been. All the same, I wonder if you know what any of the bloggers you follow have been up to recently?
I am puzzled because I thought I have seen you comment. You are a good person who connects with the subjects I am interested in. I feel this was a very good post about how others can control your decisions. The information was very articulate and sensitive.
very well said and written, the bottom line is you learn by mistakes and hope not to do it again, sometimes mistakes are costly and those are the ones you hope to stay away or listen very close friends who has been there before and try to stop you making the same, you go with your heart and feeling who to trust and think if it is a help. unfortunately in life you will have ups and downs and not always things are great as it appears just try to make the best of it, life is too short to worry. enjoy and be happy just do whatever your instinct tells you. VERY NICE BLOG AND ADVICE.
This is right on the mark!
thank you very much
I nominated you for a liebster blog award. Not sure if you got one before but you certainly deserve one in my opinion.
I had this experience in the past. I would silently build up such a hatred for people who acted in this way with me. It is not worth building up hatred and anger. Speak out, say something, anything, just make your point, then let it go and move on. They may not even realise they are doing it. If they do and are doing it on purpose, then as soon as you speak out, it will be them with the baggage not you. Either way, it is of no concern to yourself as you have spoken your mind and that is all that matters, karma tends to take care of everything else.
Some one might put words on your mouth…a nice expression! Once you wrote here not to be in a hurry in making friends, to which I agree very well. Rushing into the friendship will often cause interference and dictation against others…slow and patient will protect friendship.
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