Kid’s Are So Spoiled These Days. I Just Never Knew How Much Until Yesterday

So Yesterday, I was out on my regular shopping and I came across this kid who looked like she was 6 or 7 years old and her mother in the same aisle. I was looking at stuff and all of a sudden the kid sees something she likes, and then all of a sudden she says Mommy can I have this? The mother said no you cannot have that, the kid started to make a huge fuss and ask why? I want it now, and treating the mother terribly, then the mother said no again and the child started to cry and scream out, I was just watching this whole thing from afar and I was about to intervene, but I said you know what? I am not going to do anything. The Mother said, that’s it were going home and she said your punished, and I am taking away your cell phone. So they took off without buying anything in the store. The mother got so furious. Never mind all that, but cell phone at age 6-7? You have got to be kidding me right? I was at a loss for words that such a young child who barely got out of playing with baby toys and plastic and in the colouring phase that has a cell phone. I cannot believe how spoiled children have become. They do anything to get what they want, but I really commend this mother who kept saying no to her child. I guess the mother came to a point and put her foot down and not let her have that, but the cell phone thing really turned me off.

I just cannot believe it, I never had my first cell phone until I was 18 years old. I was so happy with my crayons, I was so happy playing with my little dolls, I was so happy with the creativity, and imagination I had when I was a kid. I did crafts, I created so many things, I drew things, I did arts and crafts with glue, coloured paper, and so much more. Now kids rely on technology to do the thinking for them and now everything revolves around keyboards and they cannot do a day without them which is pretty sad. Before I would see a lot more kids outside playing, riding bikes, playing road hockey and doing outdoor things, but now the residential streets are more quiet and kids are inside playing video games or are on the computer or texting with cell phones to other friends. If the parents keep saying yes for the kid to have the latest gadgets and if they parents don’t say no, the child obviously becomes spoiled so much and just one day when you say no, they make a big stink about it in the store, they start to threaten the mother or father at the store, they start to make a big scene, but how will we teach our children about saving money? How will we teach our children about not getting everything their classmates or friends have? How kids should not copy other people and be their own person.

I remember there was so many things that came out, and my parents always taught me just because somebody else has something it doesn’t mean that you should have it too. My parents taught me a lot when I was growing up, and I was content and happy with what I had. They told me that kids in the world don’t have toys to play with, food to eat, and other things in life, and a lot of those children in impoverished countries and places where they don’t have running water, create their own games, create their own toys and play with their friends, relatives, siblings. Its very important to realize that when kids are too spoiled and the parents always say yes to their children and they don’t get what they want, the parents need to sit down and talk to their kids, they need to teach kids values, lessons and tell them to watch videos on how kids live in third world countries, get them to realize that these kids have it so good, they have a roof over their heads, food to eat, and necessities of life. Kids should not complain that they don’t have an Ipod or the latest gaming console, or the latest cell phone or something. They should be fortunate enough and always be thankful to their parents for giving them a good life, for giving them more important things in life rather than material things. Materialism is unbelievable and when kids grow up to be spoiled and always get what they want, then they will do that to their kids and their kids will do that to theirs.

Sit down with your kids, talk to them, do something that will benefit them in the future. Kids should work more on their personalities, morale, quality, and start gaining responsibility. When kids learn at a young age, the future will be bright for them, and when they exercise the good things in life and stop making a big fuss in a store because they didn’t get what they wanted, should be a good lesson. Yesterday when I was shopping like I said with the mother and child who had a cell phone, that did it for me, and I just had to write about it, in today’s blog. I am so concerned on how spoiled kids have gotten and it needs to stop. I cannot stress it enough. Parents give their children a lot of freedom, they give them way too much than they can really handle. It’s time to say no and teach kids that having everything others have is not a great thing. don’t copy other people, be your own person and so what if other kids laugh, it all begins with the big figures in their lives which are their parents. Try it out. spend time with them and teach them. It’s the best way to go.


75 thoughts on “Kid’s Are So Spoiled These Days. I Just Never Knew How Much Until Yesterday

  1. Trash culture promotes trash thinking. People using each other as a means to an end, people cannot even chop their own veggies. Food “kits,” dumb ass phones not too “smart,” and everyone wants to be famous! No one can carry on a conversation about art or music, museums are not being supported, and we are dancing off the cliff…”

  2. My 11 year old son has a cell phone. I DID NOT want him to have it, but his father and I are divorced and he is paying for the service and bought him the phone.

    He isn’t allowed to take the phone to school. He doesn’t carry it with him when we go out. He uses it to stay in touch with his dad and on the weekends he is allowed to text and call other family and friends that live far away.

    It’s possible to still keep them from being TOO spoiled. You have have to stay involved.

    • Hey… at least Dad wants to keep touch with his son! Boys need their father’s influence or they grow up without an anchor. I’m planning to give my son a cellphone for his birthday: We use them for alarm clocks, wrist watches, texting (occasionally), diaries, and emergency phones for picking him up after a chess tournament. Bless our space-age technology! I’ll get him a basic one though because sadly there is theft at school.

  3. Hi. I used to think like you. I wasn’t raised by parents who gave me everything I wanted. I don’t give my kids everything they want. But you know what? I’ve learned that it’s not my place nor is it fair to judge what other parents do. Sure, there are a lot of parents who over indulge their children. I’m not condoning that. But you can never tell what’s really going on in someones life or what the reason behind their behaviour is just by looking at them. Certainly not by seeing one interraction in a grocery store aisle. There is usually more than meets the eye. You may be right that this is a spoiled child but just as equally, you could be mis-judging the family altogether. There are myriad reasons why a parent may think it’s in the childs best interest to have a cell phone. There are many reasons why parents allow their children to spend more time inside than outside. For all you (we) know, that girl in the supermarket spends most of her time doing art or playing an instrument or conducting science experiments. You just don’t know.

      • Ok it isn’t fair to judge, true, even if one has children, because the other mom might have challenges we don’t know about… a friend of mine is raising an autistic child – hell on Earth, for instance. But on the other hand, society exists (specifically women, this has been researched) in order to set standards and expectations. What if the tantrum was exactly what Talin thought it was? I.e. the power-over show of a spoilt brat over her comparatively defenceless mom? Society can’t just turn away and be too polite, and let it go, because if we don’t speak our mind and say children who tantrum need to be disciplined, we are setting the scene for disaster. The next generation will be horrible, selfish and brutal; and woe betide us, we’ll be the elderly in that society of “me first’s”. Thanks for a thought-provoking post, Talin! From the amount of responses you get you can see just how necessary it was. 🙂

  4. My childhood life were almost the same as yours. I too had my hand phone when I was 18. Back then, i remember all kids loves drawing, coloring, painting, but nowadays kids, they’re more computerized. They’re always on their iphone/ tablet doing their drawing and coloring, and playing games most of the time.. I know it’s the 21st century, its the technology world, but then the technology world will be there forever. Why spoil these kids with all the technologies from young? Yes, allow them to have their own space with their games, etc, but being 24/7 on their iphone/ ipad/ tablet/ etc..? It’s just making them lose a part of their childhood…and I think, my childhood seems more fun compared to nowadays kids, and i am proud of that. At least, everything seem real back then.:)

  5. I had my 1st cell phone at 25. And – that’s because my husband insisted I have one in case of a pregnancy emergency. And – I’m from a different generation. I recall beepers/pagers being all the rage when I was a teenager.
    I think with every generation there is more “spoiling” giving our children more than what we had. I really don’t consider a child spoiled by having things though – mine is more about the behavior & responses that makes a child “spoiled.”
    And – depending on how you look at it – spoiling can be a good thing – I spoil mine with love & reality. Thanks for sharing your point of view though.

    • LOL I was 30, and mother of a 3-year-old already. Times change, we are Johnny-Come-latelies to cellphones, but when I was 8 I clearly remember I knew the telephone numbers of my 3 best friends out of my head, because occasionally I called them in the afternoon. From our home phone. It was allowed, it was basically for free back then.

  6. The mother may have been talking about a toy cell phone. There are several really neat toy versions out there. My children have owned the toy versions that were givien as gifts by family members, primariy to keep them off of mine. On occasion in the market when they were making a stink said, “sorry I have to take your cell phone when we get home.” My child knows that I mean the toy one. I don’t have to say, ‘the toy.” It also is possible that she had a real cell phone. If that is the case, I commend her parents for wanting to keep in touch with her, likely she was from a broken home. (My eleven year old has asked me for a phone, and I have told her that she can not have it until she is away from me more than she is with me. This is the only reason I can see a need for it.) However, this also points to a nasty trend in society angainst spending time together, otherwise, why would one need a phone to help keep track of their child at that age? (I have nothing against single parents who have to work, and cannot spend a lot of time with thier children, I am just stating that in some instances that is the case, and that I wish for them that it were not so.)

  7. Thank you for visiting and following my blog today!! When I went to open your website and saw your statement under your Don’t ever change yourself to impress someone…WOW I needed that SOO bad today!! Thank you!!! Love your blog!
    Laurie @

  8. well toy cellphone maybe maybe not cause you wouldn’t take back a given toy but sometimes at age 12 when they start going higher schools thay have to change their school and go a little far and rely on bus at that age and to have a real cellphone is a good idea to keep in touch at all times…DO YOU KNOW WHERE YOUR CHILDREN ARE? I remember that saying on TV all the time so having one at a little older age is a safety feature nowadays, as long as you meet them at the bus station and yes you have to teach your child the difference between having or not having and appreciating of what they have, when your child is so understanding then you have a beautiful child and lucky in a way, hope all parents make them understand while they are young, they will grow up to be a very responsible and positive person…. Very nice Talin

  9. Thanks for your post! I have raised four kids, now all grown and with their own kids, and I totally agree with your assessment… the children now are much more demanding and indulged than they used to be.
    Parents are now intimidated by the media and the now popular belief that you shouldn’t punish. I’m not into beatings or public embarrassments, but these days children rule the scene way too much. There is NO Respect for adults!
    They have been empowered way beyond their ability to handle it, and partly because adults are so busy just trying to pay the bills and feel guilty for not being there, they give in out of exhaustion and the fear that they aren’t doing enough for their children.
    It’s a terrible mess! The pendulum has swung far left, away from child abuse and neglect, but too far in freedom and indulgence.
    My grown kids have a really hard time punishing, or holding to their decisions with their own children, even though I was a strong but fair disciplinarian. They knew that if I said something, I meant it and held to it.
    Now the kids just wear them down, and with TV telling them they Have to Have Everything….well, it’s pretty much out of control right now.

    • Agree with you 100%!
      Tip #1: Throw out the TV. It corrupts by message and role modelling, and in any case it messes up family time.
      Tip #2: Tell your children to draw the line in the sand for their kids. Overstepping gets punished, whether by having to go stand in the “naughty corner”, or do more chores, or privileges removed, or an outing cancelled. Respect is a must and they can’t learn to earn respect if they don’t first learn to respect. A wonderful book I read: “More secrets of happy children” by Steve Biddulph.

  10. Hiya! Just want to say thank you for liking my post today! I’ve just started to blog more regularly since we moved to Frankfurt. 🙂
    I do know what you mean when you say kids are spoilt these days. I reckon they’re growing up in an environment where having a mobile/ipod/ipad etc is the norm. When we were growing up we didn’t have these fancy gadgets to keep us occupied. Kids back then probably did scream for a barbie doll or something. I think it’s probably the attitude that shocked you most. I know for sure my parents would never allow me to do that to them (at home or in public). I’m not a parent yet so I probably won’t understand what parents go through. But my husband and I think that our kid will have to our a ‘NO’ as an answer. If they want something badly, they got to earn it. Whining, crying and screaming won’t get them anywhere far with us. But having said that, I don’t know if we’ll really be so tough as parents. 🙂

  11. I have an issue with a child having a cell phone that young, unless you give your child one of those ones that only allows you to call your house and 911. I have seen them they are out there, a child really does not need more than that. I told my kids they cannot have one unless they are 15 and can pay for the bill themselves.

    I have seen way to many kids now that feel entitled because they are kids so they MUST HAVE what ever they want, and I am beginning to think that it’s due to the school system and modern tv and books. My youngest told em she read a book recently when the main char a child got a cell for their birthday.

    That’s so not happening here, and considering where I’M living and HOW I’m living my kids staying inside playing video games and watching tv.. or surfing the net doesn’t happen. My kids are not allowed online unless I am standing over them. Why do they need to be on the net anyway? When they have a class project that need research online they do it at school where the net is seriously filtered.

    My boyfriend has a son who lives exclusively with his mother, the child is failing school because all he does is play video games or surfs the net. Mom finally had enough and removed all his game and net access and he might now have his grades do a turn around. Personally I feel the internet and all the “freedoms” a lot of people give to their kids give them a unreasonable view of the world. What happens when the kids grow up and learn they can’t have anything they want…? Throw fits till someone lets them? Not gonna happen… it’s the parents job to teach their kids about the world.. not hand them every damn thing out there and “toss them to the wolves”.

    • You have a lot of valid points here. Let’s not forget one thing though. Children who have siblings are better off. They have built-in entertainment, they spark each other’s imagination. Single children have a very difficult time, especially if the parents both work. I have three, they keep each other busy. All three love their reading, but when their fav uncle brought them each a DS gameboy, of course for a month it was nothing but games. That was okay, I let them get over the craze, they realised the limitations of the little machines in time, and mostly my youngest uses hers as an e-reader now, reading all the classics – the Jungle Book etc, and my son, when he’s in the mood, uses his for creative photos (which always tickle them pink). Currently my son’s nose is buried in a novel (Forest Circle Quest) and my youngest is washing the dishes (her chore tonight) while my oldest is attending Scouts. The key is in variety, and having a balance of allowed fun stuff, chores (!), and semi-obligatory activities such as Scouts, violin, or chess. Computer games fade into the corner that way; so do videos (they get tired of watching the same movie over and over). In home school I used to make them play Monopoly for a math game and Chess for strategy; now they do it for fun.
      If parents engage with their children, read books to them, learn a new language together or explore internet places together “let’s look up Micronesia tonight”, the children learn that variety is more fun. It also makes for better behaved children because – believe me this – they love you more that way.

  12. It is crazy, isn’t it? I recently purchased a new phone (my other one died on me), and the sales girl told me her youngest buyer was 8 years old, and it was a very expensive cell phone with internet, etc. I cannot even imagine children that young needing that.

    • You see I think “expensive” is relative. Many items (specifically electronic) cost an absolute fraction of their primitive equivalent 30 years back. Wooden toys on the other hand have gone through the roof, and they used to be readily available when we were young.

      After 30 years of inflation here in SA, during which a R27 000 house’s value is now R1 million, and a music book that cost R1 back then, is now R190, a basic bike (without gears) still costs R300, just like back then. Go figure?

  13. talinorfali:
    As a husband, and father of two pre-teen boys (11 and almost 13), I can say unequivocally: you’re 100% right.

    If your kids have unrealistic expectations (regardless of where they come from) it’s your responsibility as a parent to handle it. My two boys would no more try to throw a tantrum in the store than they would fly. That is not by chance.

    No bragging here, ’cause this isn’t rocket science. We, as parents, have a duty to raise them to have values and to teach them to THINK in all situations, on their own. I have been proven right more times than I can count by my two son’s behavior when they have been elsewhere, away from me or my wife. They’re all boy, but that doesn’t mean they’re not respectful and thinking.

    Parenting is hard; much, much, much tougher than my actual paying job. But when you get feedback from people (whom you’ve never met before) about something positive that your kid did, or they shake your hand and say “thank you”, ……there are no awards that I have ever won that can equal that feeling.

    I pray for parents everywhere that they find the strength to raise their kids lovingly-yet-firmly. The goal isn’t to have a “happy” child (whatever that even means); it’s to raise a good, solid, moral, upstanding adult.

  14. Ah, tantrums.
    While I agree that maybe 6 or 7 is a bit old for that (are you sure the child was that old, one gets some amazingly tall toddlers these days), the mother handled it correctly. (We also don’t know if the child was maybe the “slow” sort. Parents of mentally challenged children have the devil to pay, every day.)
    When a child tries a public tantrum, it is an effort to exert power over the parent by creating an uncomfortable situation for the parent. Many parents are so embarrassed by the mere idea that they will quickly buy the child what she’s demanding. This is a mistake: It means the child has won, and will use the same strategy again. The only correct course of action: Shut yourself off to what the public them-they might be thinking of you and apply consequent parenting. That means: Remove the child from the situation and punish for misbehaviour. And remember: Most children try it out at least once.
    My oldest was 3 when she decided it’s time for a public power display. She wanted a chocolate; I said no. She threw a tantrum, the classic bratty kind that people so despise, screaming as though I were hurting her. And I… burst out laughing, loudly, pointing at her and turning her spectacle right back on herself. Result: Indignant and shocked stares all round; Baby girl feels the wave of disapproval (that was probably directed at me), shuts her mouth in shock and never tried that trick again. And me: I couldn’t have cared less who saw it and who thought what of me, because I kept the objective in mind: A learning opportunity for my child. We didn’t even have to break off the shopping trip; she was well-behaved after that.

  15. like you I got my first cellphone when I was 18 and I was also raised by my parents not giving everything to me and my siblings. I did not understand then why they cannot give us things I liked. But when I was the one working already and managing my own money I realized how important that they did not give me all the stuff I wanted when I was a kid. I value more the things I am passionate with.

  16. I so agree with your comments, but I agree with Jay Train’s too – I used to have all the answers – until I had children, then realised that it’s much more complex, and there are no black and white answers.
    I absoolutely agree with your sentiments, but also know a lot of people who are doing their best in very difficult circumstances, and it’s not always clear to the outsider what is going on for them in their world.
    Thanks for a a really enjoyable, interesting & thought provoking read 🙂 Emma.

  17. Pingback: about parenting and spoilt brats « the red ant

  18. Cultivating culture in a child is like reaping seeds for plant to trees. It takes patience, more patience, immense patience and energy even post draining out all of it to be drained out again so that the culture passes on. With competitive culture, tradition of patience seem like an old aged energy deprived soul, existing but of no existence. Unless parents reap the seedling well, what you stated above will continue making grasses around us wild instead of planting beautiful trees.

  19. I can not dey that kids are spoiled however, in an age where there are many split/divorced homes, a cell phone becomes quite necessary. My son and my step daughter were both given cell phones at that age (kid phones to call very specific people) in case of emergency. The courts are unlikely to intervene in certain situations and I’d rather my son have a cell phone than not. He was just given license to use it socially at age 13 and he is well aware of the restrictions.

  20. Their is too much information and technology at kids disposal nowadays. Unfortunately i think the innocence of childhood is almost long gone.

    I think kids now-a-days act out because the parents just shrug it off.
    I would have been grounded to my room with nothing but my books, and a radio. Everywhere you look you see people on phones, or whatever technology throws at us.
    I remember driving at the age of 18 and seeing kids playing outside and now… yeah I never see that. I don’t want my child to grow up depending on technology, I want her to be independent on her own and be able to make decisions without a cell phone to her ear.
    Maybe I am not the only Mom who feels that way :/

  22. Wow! A phone at 7? Unbelievable. When I was a baby, my dad made me a wooden trolley, and I played with that trolley all the time. It carried things, it was a car, it was a pram, it was EVERYTHING until I was 8 when we moved country. Now I baby sit and there are so many toys you can hardly move through the room without standing on something, and the children get bored with one toy after about 5 minutes. Half of their toys are broken.

  23. Very, very, VERY well said. We have the same theory that kids are WAY overindulged and overstimulated, and, on the flip-side, extremely unappreciative and/or non-resourceful. Thanks for expressing it so well.

  24. Talin,

    First, thanks for the blog follow.

    Second, as a parent myself, I couldn’t agree more with the points you raised. Whatever happened to “real” toys? I remember getting a lot of negative responses from my dad and mom. I remember my tantrums. Today I realize how right they were to have denied some of the requests I made as a kid. Today’s parents are maybe too busy to do real parenting, so they easily give in to the “demands” of their kids. Still, a line has to be drawn. When is it really “spoiling the child’?

    It’s a good thing you also brought up saving. With today’s consumption driven society, it’ll be harder for kids of the future to hold on to their money. There’s always a better product — at every convenient time. People should learn when to say NO to their urges. That disciple starts from when one is young.

    Anyway, I hope this post made sense.

  25. Yes! Our grandson, who just turned 13 has his own cell phone. Until this past school year it was only to stay in touch with his working mom once school was out. Only now is he allowed to call his Grandma. That’s a good thing.
    Yes, he and his 11 year-old brother to have all the latest video games, and they do spend most of their time playing video games, watching cartoons ( at 11 and 13!!) Youtube, or playing hand-held games to the point of distracting.
    They visited us for the day on Christmas. They mostly played their hand-held games, but we took them on a “nature walk” and didn’t let them bring their games. When we ate dinner – at the table – they weren’t allowed to play them there at all. The television wasn’t on all day, and we spent time with them. Sometimes even on the floor.
    The 13 year-old told his grandmother she was his favorite because we spend time with them and don’t just send them money or a gift card for more games. Instead, we buy them t-shirts, books, etc.
    They don’t get away with any s–t when they’re with us, either. But they know we love them and we’re not just punishing them for no good reason, and they’re truly sorry.
    It can be done, but it’s hard. Especially when their mother doesn’t do the same. But they appreciate the time we give them!

    • I have a step son like that … his mother lets’ him sit on his laptop ALL day long – he’s 14 and has a slight disability – but he used to be so much into the outdoors and playing outside (he used to play with his Lego and dominoes a lot when he was here), now he brings the laptop every other weekend when we have it (I secretly can’t wait for it to break). I don’t think he likes it here too much because I’m always limiting his time on that thing. I told him this year when we go camping he’s not allowed to bring it – so he told me then he’s not going camping – oh well, guess we’ll be taking one less kid. It’s a real shame …
      My kids were never into those gaming machines – I would never allow it – I think we had a game cube and they barely played it. I got a 2nd hand WII because I thought it’d get ME off the couch … lol ..and they don’t play with that either … nor do I actually.
      And don’t get me started on cell phones … I think it’s part of my daughter’s hand … ‘click click click click’ is all I here when she’s texting … drives me insane … she’s 16.

  26. Yes, great work.
    Kids are spoiled all right.
    Like you, I feel for them though.
    I think parents are overstressed with more outside work now than when we were coming up.
    They feel they have to work day and night to just stay ahead and give their kids what they need. Want? Well, probably that’s part of the problem too, not knowing difference between the two.
    By the way, thanks, for following my blog.
    Ministry and podcasting keep me from writing a lot so, don’t think I’m neglecting just because I don’t say much.
    I suppose that you’re giving a good shout out with the writing and keyboard, while my big mouth is mostly with the microphone; and, a little piano keyboard, and strings to go along with it.
    All blessings.

  27. Not a chance my daughter would get ANYTHING if she tried to emotionally blackmail me.

    She once threw a tantrum (she was about 3yo) when I said no to her, in a supermarket. I looked down at her and said “No” quietly and then walked away and left her to it (inside I was dying from embarrassment but I stood my ground) and when I moved into the next aisle (peeking back to see what she was doing) she gave up and chased after me .. whereupon we sat and had a lil discussion about the merits of tantrums. Or lack thereof *grin*

    She’s a very indulged / loved child of 23yrs (lol @ child) now who has never since thrown a tantrum and altho she gets a lot of things from me – she appreciates them AND me and tells me so often. THAT is the ultimate win-win I think!

  28. It could have been a toy cell son has one of those and it’s one of his favorites. It would definitely be something I take from him for being naughty. I do agree that kids are more spoiled these days but I don’t like to judge it based on one interaction and not knowing the parent or child. Thank God my son is well behaved but he does have off days and it would break my heart if someone judged him based on that one moment.

  29. Hi Talin,
    Thanks for stopping by my blog. I like yours too. I tried to put myself in the shoes of the mother you observed in the store. I am single mother with a 6 year old son who has Aspergers. Sometimes it is hard to find something you can use as leverage to get them to do what you want them to do. For my son, it is his computer and internet connection (he plays Lego Hero Factory online) or a favourite dvd he maybe interested in watching over and over again at that point in time. I am constantly on the look out for new things he maybe interested in (his interests being so narrow) with the hope that if he really gets into it, then that will be useful the next time he won’t do his homework or tidy up his toys as something I can take away…Hope this makes sense and reinforces the opinion that there is always more to the story than meets the eye……

  30. I could not agree more – though we do live in a very different society now and it is hard to judge too much. Kids with phones at that age though are just asking for trouble.. 😦

  31. I agree, it drives me crazy. I’m a cashier at a dollar store, and every day I see both good and bad parenting. I’m taking it as a lesson on what to do and what not to do raising a kid. Glad I’m not the only one who feels like this!

  32. Next time you’re in a restaurant, observe the parents and the children. Typically, the children have an electronic device (iPhone, iPad, or some other type of device) and are playing a video game or watching television. In other words, they’re not engaged with the parents (which is quite alright because the parents aren’t engaged either).

    We’re raising up a generation of empty souls, or people who do not know how to behave in public or carry on a conversation. I fear what will happen to society.

  33. Lets face it, no kid is going to be happy until they have the latest I phone. It is up to the parents to make rational decisions and it would be great if there was some kind of national consensus. I think that kid should have a cell phone if they are going to be alone and unsupervised at any time. As a parent, if you wonder where your kid is and cannot get an answer, then it is cellphone time. A cheap prepaid phone like a Tracfone is best. You can limit the amount of minutes that are used and the phone can easily be replaced if lost, stolen or dropped in a pond.

  34. Hi! I totally agree with you. The kids are brought up so differently from us nowadays. They have all the different technologies at their finger tips. Parents have to be firm with them.

  35. Hi Talin,

    Thank you for reading my blog – this one was rather interesting and I have a comment. 🙂
    Although, I do think 6-7 years old is very young for a child to have a cell phone – do they even know how to dial someone’s number?? I don’t think it’s spoiling them when they have one at let’s say age 12 or so … whatever age a parent allows their child to go out on their own. My kids all had cell phones when they were 12 … the pay as you go ones though … just so I can keep track of where they are. I know, when we were kids we had the decency to call our parents when we got to where we were going … but society today is SO different now and kids go missing way too often. My step son broke his phone a couple of days ago and I sit on my bed every evening that he’s out wondering I wonder if he’s going to make curfew (midnight) and if not, how am I going to get hold of him? (thankfully, I have his friends’ cell number on the house phone).
    My sister wants to get her daughter a cell phone – I asked her, “does she go anywhere without you?” and she never used to, but now my sister is allowing my 11 yr old niece to walk to her friends’ house, to school, to the park …
    I think it’s a great thing for them to have cell phones – I know where my kids are all the time and who they are with … they are just a text message away … so I suppose for my selfish reasons and their safety reasons, cell phones are a plus for me.


  36. Thank you for visiting and following my blog! You are very thoughtful. I remember chatting with a friend recently about how society has changed and people feel the need to own so much, even when they cannot afford it. It is sad, because when my friend and I looked back on our own childhood, we both didn’t have much in the way of toys or entertainment, no tv etc. But we never felt poor, because we felt wealthy culturally and creatively, and when we feel frustrated now, it is at times when we feel we have more potential than we have yet realised, not because we want more possessions. I feel incredibly blessed.
    I hope that our next generation do not become poor in the things that really fulfil by covering them up in things that simply distract.

  37. My first cell phone wasn’t until I was 25, then it was a work phone. I just didn’t need it, even today I rarely use it except for work and it’s an emergency number for my son. As for my son, he’s not getting a cell phone until he gets a job. If he is going somewhere and might need one I will lend him mine.
    AS fr the outside thing, both my neighbor and myself make the kids play outside for at least an hour, they whine about it, but rarely do they come in when their hour is up, they have found better things to do.

  38. Thank you for visiting my blog :). I definitely agree. My son asked me the other day for an IPad. He’s six… I asked him if he had the money. That usually works. Also when he complains about supper I give him the option to eat some dirt if he’d rather have that. There are times I do spoil him and times I’m strict. Some people may think I’m too strict but my son is well rounded, loves the Lord, and likes to help others (like Bingo at the nursing home). The key is finding balance……you don’t want to crush their spirit but you also don’t want to let them become criminals. If the child thinks the world revolves around them then they will fall flat on their face in the real world. If you truly love someone you will make the hard choices….Kids feel safer with structure. Rules are there to protect and children need guidance. Kids aren’t born with wisdom….they have to be taught.

  39. I completely agree! I was so content with crayons and paper- my imagination would be my favorite toy. I loved playing library in my room, having tea parties etc. I’m still young, but I’m glad I wasn’t born in the age where 6 year holds have phones. I’d come out a completely different person.

    I remember back in 5th grade, I had reading buddies from first grade and they always treated me with much respect.
    I recently went out of state with my church and we were practicing waitressing to improve our foreign language skills. A group of 8-9 year holds sat at a table, all of them taking pictures with their phones. They purposely threw trash on the floor because I was cleaning up. I even hear some swear words coming from them! What happened to treating your elders with respect?

  40. Eh, child spoiling I think has always been apart of us. It’s just that our side of the world has advanced so much in terms of possessing all of the basic needs surpasses even the spoiled princes of centuries past.

    I think the fact young kids have cell phones and iPods may be a sign of our own age than the reality of the world in 2012. For instance, I am twenty years old. During elementary school it was unthinkable to have a cell phone because its uses were very grown up and were very expensive. Fast forward to high school when it drops in price and it is a sign that you’ve matured. Add in games, music, video calling, pictures, etc. and you appeal to an even younger audience. It was the summer before grade twelve when I received my first cell phone and that’s only because my parents were frightened that they messed up when they’d pick me up from a dangerous part of town at midnight. I didn’t even want a cell phone and was indeed the last person in my class to receive one. Even four years later I average spending two dollars a month on it.

    Four years later also means the technology advances further and incidents like mine spread leaving kids in the primary grades to have a cell phone. Cell phones are essentially toys now with useful communication for the parents to contact their children. It’s bizarre to us but very much the norm. It must be how my older siblings felt when I laid my hands on a video game at age five and started playing. They were from a time where you needed to be teenagers before being able to enjoy video games.

    The most bizarre moment for kids with technology happened to me a couple years ago. My mom does daycare for a living of two to five year olds. One of the kid’s moms bought a MP3 player for her birthday. A four year old. With a MP3 player. I had a laugh at this for weeks. However I examined the MP3 player and the design of it was geared towards a very young audience. I couldn’t believe it. My first MP3 was when I was fifteen and it was on for twenty bucks. But on the other hand I had my first Discman when I was eight which must have seemed crazy to everyone else. I have clued in that a MP3 player and cell phone is a new norm for the elementary school student because technology has advanced that far.

    It’s the technological advances that are autonomous in nature is what makes us believe kids are spoiled when we see them possess those items.

    In regards to if kids are really spoiled now more than ever because of them talking back, I think we need to consider that the Spoiled Kid has been around for at least the past thirty years given how advanced we are. “Parents want to give their kids what they didn’t have” etc etc etc and have free reign to talk back. Now it is commonplace because the original spoiled kids are having their own kids, and can likely handle being talked back to because they did it themselves as a child.

    So I think those are the causes for it moreso than our revisionistic history that everybody behaved and things were fine and dandy when we were younger. It’s just a completely different world in terms of what’s available to us.

  41. Thank you for leaving a Like on my blog and subscribing as well.

    I really liked this post. I enjoyed your writing but I have to say, I agree.
    What the hell is with parents these days? We all grew up content and happy – without tons of toys and gadgets. Just because the world has changed and they are available doesn’t mean trees stopped growing and can’t be climbed and grass isn’t there to run around on.
    My boyfriend’s 9 year old had an absolute melt down the other night as there wasn’t an iPhone for her to play on. So? Read a book love. I just couldn’t help it … I laughed at her.

    Now I remember my parents laughing at me. And I know how ridiculous I must have looked.

    But I’m so sure my tantrum was for a more worthy cause than playing Fruit Ninja on an iPhone!

    Still – I don’t know where we got our sense of self entitlement from or when we forgot how to be happy with nothing. I hope we – all of us – find it again.

  42. I am very sure that the one comment is right. It must have been a toy phone. Nobody can afford a phone bill for a seven years old, I hope that, that is right, but anyway kids are spoilt, I have seen 15 year old boys who cannot and will not mow the lawn. That is not very nice but, they have not been taught to respond, and i am not talking about responcibility. Respond denote reciprication, a form of good communication, and to be started when they are toddlers. Yes responce not responcibility.

  43. I agree that spoiling kids can get out of hand very quickly. Technology is such a part of our everyday lives that we have to be careful of how we control it or it will control us (i.e. Facebook). However, the fact that that mom put her foot down and left the store w/o buying anything speaks volumes. Don’t be too quick to judge…who knows what exactly the “cell phone” is being used for.
    I have a 7 year old son who plays games on my phone (angry birds, doodle jump, etc.). When I recently upgraded to a better phone he asked if he could have my old phone. We took the sym card out and it no longer has service so it’s basically an iTouch. He can’t make calls, send texts or get on the internet. He calls it “his phone” and I cringe when I hear that but I don’t see it much differently than a DS, Leapster or other hand held gaming device. I certainly wouldn’t buy my 7 year old an iTouch b/c I feel like that is way too much money to be spent on something that is probably going to get broken, but the old phone was going to be recycled anyway so why not? We have to set limits on screen time but that’s just a part of raising kids in this age of advanced technology.
    Thanks for stopping by my blog and hitting “like” 🙂

  44. The world is changing so fast and so are kids. Have you watched kiddies cartoons… Cartoons are actually mearnt for kids anyway. Hmm, .. The cartoons and other kiddies movies portray rude kids who talk back at their parents, violence and oh… babies falling in love and kissing and living happily ever after. Disaster is certainly ahead of us.

  45. Your example isn’t very effective in illustrating your point – the behaviour the parent showed in the store was the opposite of spoiling, in fact she held her ground in the face of a tantrum. Digital technology isn’t necessarily an indicator that someone is spoiled, it just speaks to our changing cultural priorities and values. If the kid got a new cell phone every quarter when new styles and models were released, that would be spoiled, but you have no idea if that’s the case.

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