Calling Me Weird is unacceptable! Do Not Judge Me When You Don’t Know Me!

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Tonight after going to the first bible study session since Christmas, I had a great time learning, seeing friends, and catching up on everything. It was a lovely night. Every Thursday nights there are bible studies I attend and thankfully it started again. I was looking forward to this for so many days now and I am glad it finally happened. I learn alot from this priest who teaches us and his teaching and explaining technique is wonderful. After all that, I had turned on my cell phone and that is where everything of the night got ruined for me.

I had received a message from somebody saying you are so weird, a lot of people know you and your one of the most weirdest people ever. Your pathetic, your blog is pathetic, so on and so forth. I retaliated and I said to her and she had her name on it, well, excuse me, but who are you first of all? and Why are you writing such ugly messages to me? I have not done anything to you and I do not even know you or have ever seen you. I said to her you and your friends whoever they are need to close your mouths and quit judging other people until you know them personally. It is unbelievable what society has become. They have nothing better to do, than to cause problems for others, judge others, talk and gossip about others and make assumptions, and get on other peoples nerves. It is very ridiculous. It even hits you harder when you have done nothing. Lately, I have been getting shut down quite a lot and I try to ignore it as much as possible and I try to ignore these negative things, but when things like this is happening, it is very difficult to get past it. Because of what she wrote, I will not stop my blogging and I will not stop doing what I love doing. They need to look at themselves in the mirror before they judge and make derrogatory comments. Lately, I don’t know what is happening to some people. They have become so nasty. I know that there is a saying where if people see you getting more upset and agitated about something, they will do it more and they will irritate you even more, but I need to speak up about it and I need to vent it out on my blog. Its the best way I know how to right now.

I have so many lovely supporters, fellow bloggers and incredible people who back me up and give me incredible advice and give me such rays of sunlight on my blog everyday. You all mean the world to me and that is what is keeping up and that is what is defeating all the negative energy I have been getting from certain people and I was not expecting something so horrid come into my phone after I had come out from bible study out of all the places and the time it had to happen. I am just so fed up. I have also been taking a facebook break for a few days. These things have really got to me and hit me really hard. I need to now focus on myself now and what I have to do to better myself in terms of employment and keeping my promises to work on my blog with the travel tips and getting peoples links on my page. That is what is important to me now. Facebook can wait. I will only be on facebook to answer questions and everything in my inbox and really important questions people ask, but My time on facebook is slowly diminishing. I cannot handle it anymore, I cannot handle people attacking me because of what I believe in and what I do such as blogging and what I write about.

Thank you to my lovely supporters, family, friends and fans. You all mean the world to me and I love you all. You all are the reason why I have the energy to write everyday. I will do my best to block out peoples insensitivity and negativity toward me. Easier said than done, but I am up for the challenge.

62 thoughts on “Calling Me Weird is unacceptable! Do Not Judge Me When You Don’t Know Me!”

  2. Hi Talin, I’m so sorry that you had to experience that. The horrible person is just a bully, and you can’t give mean-spirited people the power to hurt you. I wouldn’t even be surprised if she is jealous because you have so many friends and are so successful in reaching out to people. As my mother used to say, “The best revenge is living well.” Live well, enjoy your friends and your blogging and your success. Take good care of yourself, and remember that we care about you too!

  3. DON;T EVEN READ IT JUST IGNORE, NOT EVERYONE IS PERFECT THERE , WHEN OU GO TO THE MARKET TO BUY FRUITS YOU WILL ALWAYS FIND ONE OR TWO BAD ONES, YOU JUST TOSS THEM OUT IR DO NOT TOUCH THEM, YOU JUST EAT THE SWEET ONES AND ENJOY…LIFE IS THE SAME AS FRUITS JUST PICK YOUR BEST FRIENDS AND ENJOY AND DO NOT PAY ATTENTION TO THE BAD APPLES, THEY ARE BIG LOSERS WITHOUT BRAIN AND HEART… I FEEL SORRY FOR THEM IN A WAY….. KEEP ON BLOGGING

  5. Never underestimate the power of the “delete” button. Your writing is wonderful and I enjoy your blog very much. Keep up the good work.

  6. Hey sweety,

    truth is, we’re all weird. If we weren’t, we’d be clones of some perfect being with no individual characteristics that define us. If you are out of the norm, that’s nothing to be ashamed of. People will talk, and people will wonder, but in the end, it’s how you view yourself that matters. lift your chin and keep writing. You are compassionate, kind, sympathetic and have a love for cooking. Obviously, you also have a love for knowing as many people as possible. Good for you! Everything you have simply enriches your heart and your mind. Think of it this way.. you’re infamous! 😉 many years from now, my name may be forgotten, but people will say, “Do you remember that girl named Talin Orfali? What was it about her?” You’ll have people wondering about you and talking about you long after everyone else has been forgotten 😉

  7. Talin, do not let others make or break your day. You are a unique individual with many talents and interests. There is no one else just like you. Relish your uniqueness and do not let someone else’s sour attitude spoil your day. I enjoy your zest for life expressed through your blog. 🙂

  10. It is my belief that someone is very lonely, very bored, has no imagination and is very bitter and angry about their lot in life – so they will pick on a happy, successful, well-liked person such as yourself to make themselves feel “big”.

    I’d just laugh it off, Talin. It’s they who are weird; certainly not you!

  12. Your love for people and your zest and zeal for life is beautiful and inspiring. I absolutely love reading your posts. I am also glad that you are able to vent when someone hurts you. It is good for you and makes me and, I’m sure, all of your fans love, respect and appreciate you even more. Love and forgive your detractors and, in fact, pray for them and, by all means, keep on being you. -Frank

  13. That is a real shame. There are people who feel free to be mean and destructive without limit on the internet. I haven’t so far experienced gratuitous abuse like that, but I have found people in discussions getting very nasty and personal when I or someone else disagree with them however politely, as if they’re spoilt children who’ve never experienced someone saying no.

    Your response to this unpleasant post was very measured and adult.

    • Your comment reminded me of something I had meant to tell Talin when I first replied to this post. As you say, internet bullying is – sadly – everywhere, because everybody’s braver when they can hide behind a keyboard.

      I have a little set of what I jokingly call “disciples” on a different, much more amateur site than this – your basic gang of internet trolls. Although they can no longer see my daily posts there, they delight in finding comments that I’ve left to other users so that they can continue their abuse. My crime? Getting angry about the behaviour of someone they know and daring to rant about it. I’ve done nothing to these people, personally.

      Talin, next time you recieve a hateful message, try to smile and do as I do: tell yourself that you must be incredibly important if this person took the time to sit at a keyboard and waste energy typing angry words at you. All it means is that you’re unforgettable and the person concerned is probably envious of your popularity and fascinating life 🙂

  17. Since you appear to be a fellow Christian, I shall attempt to encourage you with God’s word. Remember what He said in John 16:33. “I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world.”

    John 15: 18-19 “If the world hates you, keep in mind that it hated me first. 19 If you belonged to the world, it would love you as its own. As it is, you do not belong to the world, but I have chosen you out of the world. That is why the world hates you.

    Be assured you are loved by those of us not of this world! And that’s all that matters. Keep writing! Keep proclaiming His glory.

  18. There are a lot of negetive people out there with nothing better to do then bring someone down. As long as you realise that most of these people are super insecure and are only acting out in a way that they are used too. Writing is a good way to vent, release, and then move on. Really enjoyed reading!;) Oh, and p.s……I’m now a follower!;)

  19. These are just SAD people who do not deserve your grief or time of day. Please ignore it. I wonder how many followers they have. I bet they can’t even write! It is jealousy, pure and simple

  20. Don’t even pay a moments attention to some stupid emails or comments. I think hate mail is a sign of success…means you’re reaching the masses,and we can’t always please everyone. You’re amazing and you have a blog where you share yourself with the world. I think that’s pretty awesome.
    ~FringeGirl

  21. Hi Talin

    I am so sorry these people are being horrid to you. I think they are just jelous because lots of people like your blog and pay a lot of attention to it, so the attention is not on them. You are open and honest with people. These are great qualities that can lead to others being difficult with you as they are not as good at expressing themselves as you are. That is their problem, not yours. You are a lovely person who just likes making others happy. Keep smiling and the world will smile with you.
    Sandra. quirkybooks.wordpress.com

  22. By replying to that girl, you just 1) acknowledged her existence, 2) validated her theory, 3) told her how affected you are about her opinion which, in and of itself, will already give her a certain satisfaction. Perhaps, next time, it would do you better to ignore and take the high road. You’re the one who has the blog. You’re the one “wielding the pen”, so to speak. Just continue doing what you’re doing and have confidence in the integrity of your writing. You write about life from your POV. That’s that. No apologies. (if this comes off as a bit harsh as compared to other comments, just file it under “tough love”). Chin up, girl.

  23. Take it as a compliment:

    You atteded a Bible Study felt lifted by God. Satan then used someone to try and bring you down. If Satan feels the need to concentrate on you, you must have a special purpose Tal. I’m new to reading but I love what I have seen so far

    Have a lovely day

  24. Reading things like this make me wonder what hope there is for society. For the most part, people are just so into themselves, interested in putting people down to make themselves look better, when it just makes them look really pathetic. They are arrogant, and rude!
    It always hurts when people put you down, no matter how optimistic and self-assured you are. Personally I use negative bull crap to light a spark in me and focus that energy into getting motivated to do something with my life; not to sound too mean, but I love the idea that the girls who picked on me at school left without going to college and now have dead end jobs, whilst I’ve just graduated and have the chance to get a really great job.
    As with anything in life, it is all about how you deal with it =)

  25. Very interesting that you would have gotten this message coming out of Bible study Talin. God has a unique way of giving us what we need. When you ask for strength, He sends you the opportunity to show strength you already have within you. You ask for love, He send you individuals who need it most for you to feel love in your heart because you have so much to offer.

    When someone offends this way, it is because they are miserable inside and can only express the negativity and hatred they feel. They may see your strength, love and support you get from your friends and envy it because they need it most. They may see your courage in tackling the world of blogging and they know they wouldn’t know where to start. And so yes, you may not write as perfectly as in a medical journal, a blog is not that at all. You write from the heart and that is what speaks to people. That honest from the heart content is what is getting to your perpetrator.

    So dear Talin, take this as a challenge sent by God to only make you that much stronger! You have great support already!

  26. Keep writing and keep putting your feelings down on paper. It’s good to remember that everyone has an opinion, but their opinion is not necessarily the truth…it’s just their stuff, and not yours.

  27. So what is weirder than someone who takes time to insult a perfect stranger? She/he doesn’t like your blog? Why read it, then?

    The Internet brings out the tiny bullies who have their own psychological issues. Don’t even read their posts–stop when you see where the post is heading. Never respond, unless it’s a legal issue. Think of them as “flashers.” No response and they go elsewhere with their problems.

    BTW, a French blog I follow (American woman married a Frenchman, lives in France) just today mentioned how she was called an unfit mother when she talked about her family laundry. Apparently she doesn’t separate out the socks and–iron the family sheets and underwear! We women just can’t do anything right!

    So you really can’t win when you are in the public eye. Keep on with your blog; you seem to be a caring person who reaches out to others. Don’t let the nutcases pull you down.

    Chris [at] chriskellywriter[at]wordpress.com

  28. Unbelievable. It is unfortunate that our society comes with all types of people, even ones you never thought could exist or wished didn’t exist. I agree with several of the comments above that this person is just completely jealous your blog is a success and you have thousands of fans she wishes she had. In hindsight, it’s like a compliment expressed in a negative way, and this can also be viewed as an opportunity to build “thicker skin”. Don’t let her stop you from what you’re doing right. It was very stupid and immature of her to leave such a message and it sounds like she hasn’t grown up since junior high. Also, if you continue to get more harassing messages, I might suggest changing your number so you don’t get any more of these unnecessary calls, and make sure you’re giving the number to true friends – not those who stood you up (as you mentioned in a previous blog post).

  29. I truly believe that god tests and challenges us every day. I think he put forth this trial to make you stronger as a person and to remind you that you have a great support system.

    To be honest, people like that make themselves miserable and angry and it

    • …is up to you to let go and move on. You cannot help those people that want to be negative towards you. Just keep on doing what makes you happy and enjoy life’s moments.

      I was typing from my iPhone and accidentally hit done – hence why the 2 replies. My bad! 🙂

  30. I think you are not only delightful, but a ray of sunshine in a world that could use a whole lot more of it! Don’t let anyone rain on your parade because of their own meanness… There are so many more people who adore you just the way you are!

  31. I live in Austin, Texas where the slogan of the city is: “Keep Austin Weird.” There are bumper stickers everywhere with this sentiment. So in my view, weird is a good thing. It means you’re unique and interesting, rather than cookie-cutter and boring.

  32. Tal, the minute I told “Friends”, I was back in church they disappeared, I fell off the pulpit for a minute they reappeared especially at the taverns, I had a minor situation they disappeared and have not reappeared. The only person that has been by my side along has been The Lord Almighty carrying me through many trials and tribulations much I brought upon myself as I am human. Stay on your path ignore those passing judgement for someday it will be there turn to answer for it.
    Nice work keep it up

  34. Hi Talin,

    I have learned over the years that people who are happy and confident in themselves don’t feel the need to verbally assault others. Internet trolls are commonly people with a hidden and seething sense of inferiority. They feel deeply flawed and don’t know how to express it in their real lives so instead they anonymously do things like this. Sad really that someone would be so jaded and stuck in their misery that they feel the need to act out in this way.

    Believe me when I tell you that I know all about being at the receiving end of hatred. I am a Muslim woman and I wear hijab daily. When someone treats me with disdain I try very hard not to internalize it. But, something about me provokes something in them. Regardless of my good intentions I can not control others.

    Sometimes something in us causes others to react in ways we can’t understand. I think because you have a successful blog that is seen by many, many people odds are that you will get that occasional lunie-tune. It’s not easy being a blogger in this way because as you write your feelings and perceptions you can’t please everyone! It’s a vulnerable place to be in when you expose how you feel or what you believe. Someone is bound not to like what you say or stand for.

    Alas, there will always be people who just don’t like others for absolutely no reason what so ever than that they just don’t like the person! There is no rationale there.

    Keep on doing what you love in your blogging and follow your passions. For every occasional crazy person there are hundreds who absolutely adore you-including me! Just delete the hatred and don’t give it any of your energy.

  35. YOU SUUUUUUCK! The fact is you don’t even have proper grammer or punctuation. You would think someone who wants to write for a living would learn how to fucking spell and stop using “so on and so forth” in every god damn blog. You are the most selfish person I know and just because I couldn’t see you you go and complain. Get a life. People get busy. Everything is NOT about YOU!

  36. As the Internet meme goes: Haters gonna hate. In such cases ignorance is bliss. Just delete the message, block the sender (if possible) and move on, really. Though I shouldn’t think anyone, even the trolls in question, have any place to judge if you kept a copy of an ASCII middle finger to fire back. 🙂

  37. Don’t waste your time worrying what these brainless idiots like the oh so brave ‘Anonymous’ think or write, you have plenty of supporters, keep on doing what you’re doing and ignore them.

  38. You are the one that has to have the strength to ignore the person and NOT read the text’s or messages from them. You will be stronger in the long run for it. It may seem as though you are cowering away from them but the truth is you are becoming stronger. The more you complain about the situation, the more times you respond, the more that person is succeeding in bringing you down. Not everything has to be a fight. Yes, in a perfect world people wouldn’t act rude, but we don’t live in perfection. Save your strength for the real fights and the TRUE injustices, in the time being keep your head up. God is smiling upon you right now, don’t take that for granted. There is honor in keeping your cool.

  39. Listen, I know I wont be popular here for this, but your not a good writer. Everyone who supports you is being a nice person. You need ppl who arnt “nice ppl” to like what you do. That is when you know you actually hav talent. Maybe these “nice ppl are doing you a deservice by not being honest to you. Its time to drop the facebook and blogs and actually buck up and try something else. Unless of course you are actually happy with your full life? i may be wrong but To me it doesnt sound like you are. Time to drop the persona of someone who continually looks fpr approval and sympothy from others, especially on the internet. Im truly sorry to have Its tough to hear things you dont like.

  40. hi Talin ! I agree with most of the comments here and encourage you to continue blogging, you are doing a world of good for many people and your readers. So what if we don’t always write with so-called “perfect” grammar and punctuation? So many great writers and poets had odd grammar and punctuation, some of them even invented their own styles complete with unique spellings and were perfectly understood (although not all the time). Like many of the commenters said, when you are popular and read by many people, there are bound to be negative comments by people who have their own agendas, personal or otherwise. You will go crazy if you pay attention to them. It is the surest sign of blogging success when even those who hate you read you. That said, congrats and more power to you, God bless you!

  41. I am going to try to give you constructive criticism here. I don’t know you or your so-called “haters” personally, but what I do know is this — you are blogging because you want to be a writer.

    1) On grammar, punctuation and spelling – You want to be a writer; get it right. (Btw, your detractors also have room for improvement. It’s “grammar”, not “grammer”. And they seem to have difficulty distinguishing “your” vs. “you’re”) Any writer worth his/her salt would know that there are no excuses. Any typos are immediately corrected while drafting or, if you’ve hit the publish button inadvertently, you would edit or publish an erratum if you can’t edit anymore. Why? Because you’re a writer; you use words as your tools. You want those words to be strung together as perfectly as possible to convey your message. Besides, unless you’re E.E. Cummings or have gotten to that status, that’s the only time deviation becomes tolerable, when the deviation is a deliberate part of your signature as a writer. Take note of the word “deliberate”.

    2) Your haters may have not said it in the best possible way, but there is truth in what they’re saying. Some of your readers, in coddling you and lauding you as a “nice girl who writes pleasant pieces”, may be doing you a disservice in not being totally honest with you. Be thankful they were honest enough to point this out because if you want to be a writer, you will take your lessons at bettering the craft when you can and from whomever feels so inclined to give it.

    They find your content objectionable because, according to them you are pathetic and self-absorbed. Well, all bloggers writing about their lives are self-absorbed so don’t even bother with that. The difference is that you present yourself as wanting to be a writer and your blog, your medium for doing so. They’re holding yourself up to a standard that you set for yourself. Can you blame them?

    Think of tabloids vs. the Smithsonian or National Geographic. Undoubtedly, the tabloids will have more readers but when it comes to substance or quality of the readership and the articles, the latter will get the vote of the harshest critics. When I read your posts, a constant theme is that you’ve been treated unfairly, rudely, harshly by a lot of people you considered friends and you feel sorry for yourself. There is nothing wrong with this. It is a great opening salvo but the question is, what are you going to do about it? What these haters are getting is the lack of progression/evolution of this “plot”. What they read again and again is that some other person treated you shabbily and you feel sorry for yourself AGAIN.

    So the issue really goes beyond writing. It points to a victim mentality that remains to be the undercurrent of your posts despite the obvious optimism you exude. And here, your haters are asking, so you got the short end of the stick, what are you going to do about it? Even if the issue goes beyond writing, your writing still reflects it. Your haters are frustrated because of the lack of progression, the build up to the climax. If you want to view this incident as a positive, think of it as their way of saying they want to see you succeed in your goal of being a writer, not only one who writes voraciously but one who writes well.

    That is valuable feedback that you won’t get often. So when you get it, welcome it. Throw out the negativity, and keep the constructive criticism and work on it. If you do so with an open mind and heart, you will do so much better in the struggle you call life, minimize the pain and disappointment you feel when it happens again, and, more importantly, you will better yourself at the craft you’ve chosen to devote yourself to. Good luck!

  42. And calling you weird IS acceptable. You want to be a “blogger” with “fans” who are only other loser “bloggers” that kiss each others ass. Well if you want to be in the public eye, then expect some sort of backlash. Instead of bitching and complaining and so on and so forth, just shut your mouth and keep working. You can’t have it go both way. Just shut up and stop preaching. It’s so fucking annoying. 🙂

  43. Yowee, I think I met your person! He backed out of his parking spot almost right into me, me laying on the horn. I thought I was going to be hit, and really thought it may be an older person not in control, maybe having a stroke. But they just got tired of waiting for traffic to clear, I guess. When I went up along side them to get in the turn lane, I saw it was a 30-something guy. He smiled and waved, mocking me. There are lots of nasty, unthinking people in the world, but thankfully there are also many kind. Hope your days are filled with joy . . and nice people!!!!

  46. A mixture of comments on here. Cellar Door’s advice: ACCEPT the positive ones :), TAKE NOTE of the constructive ones and use them if you feel it will add to your life and blogging experiences. Finally LAUGH at the people who have nothing better to do than attack you. THOSE are the ones that shouldn’t influence how you feel. They’re not worth the energy or time x

  50. Don’t let the trolls get to you! There will always be negative people who get joy out of tearing others down. We have to forget them and move on.

  51. i’m not going to say i’m 1000 yrs old its just that i feel that way sometimes in the morning lol … look who gives a rats about what people say etc your life is yours and no matter what goes down you’ll always dare to be different … they know it and will try to bring you down to their level but he who is in you is stronger than he who is in the world … dream for those who dont …

  52. There are big loser’s in this world my dear. Their motive is to spread their sloppiness and loser attitude to all and make this world the worst place to habitat. So just ignore as soon as you see such responses.

    For good or bad, your doing what you love. That is what the most important thing in life. Even i am sad to read this post. Sorry that i am replying a bit late due to my away from blog for a while. But overall you write good posts and keep up the hot posts 🙂

  53. Unfortunately, people don’t fallow the rule “if you can’t say something nice, don’t say it at all”. It Saddens me. Just keep doing your thing mama. 😉

  55. That is horrible! If people have nothing nice to say, then don’t say anything at all. (hugs) I enjoy reading your blog when I am on here. Keep up the good work! You still have a ton of fans out there that support what you are doing!

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