In My life I have learned not to keep anything bottled up inside and always spill the beans no matter what. I actually feel so much better everytime I do because if I keep anything bottled up inside of me, that makes life a lot more stressful and a big burden on your heart and it may suffocate you in the long run. Blogging takes a lot out of me as I express my feelings with writing and I talk to close people and loved ones in my life who understand my situations. If your going through rough times, or if you feel like venting out, do it. It is very good for you and it takes a big load off your mind and heart. You may not be aware of it, but you actually do make it better by speaking out about it.
People get sick, stressed, over-analyze themselves, sells ones self short, and all these terrible things can happen if all of us don’t speak out. People always tell me to never keep things inside of me unless they are secrets and things that people do not want me to tell anyone, that will always stay with me forever and I will never tell a soul, but besides that among everything else it should be said out, and they told me to never hesitate and be afraid of expressing myself. Its part of Human nature. All of us have problems, all of us have our worries so on and so forth, but its always good to say it out loud, its always good to confide in someone, if we don’t those problems will escalate and escalate and to the point like its a temperature gauge and when the mercury will explode. You do not want to get yourself to that level.
When you have a problem with someone, when you have issues you would like to discuss to someone, you tell it to their face and come up with solutions to solve that problem, or talk it over with someone, without other people interfering, and just have an open communication with whatever bothers you inside and whatever you need to express. Its super important to realize that. You may strengthen bonds with others by just doing that. You need to talk pleasantly and start the conversation by, “we need to talk about something that has been bothering me” or something along the lines of just being sincere and respectful as you confront the person, because nobody wants anyone to hound them and give them grief. Its always good to be respectful about it, rather than being hateful and rude. It sets yourself up for more problems when you want to solve it with others. You will see problems diminish and you will see that your bonds with people will be more strong if your straight forward, if you apply yourself and just let it all out. You don’t want a two faced person in front of you and a person who laughs and smiles but really they cannot stand the fact that there are problems that have not been discussed.
Some people do not realize the wrong they do, so we must make people aware of it and tell them like it is. No one likes a fake person. Its important to be real, to be nice about it and you will see how things will get better.
Life can sometimes throw obstacles to your face, so we need to talk to prevent those obstacles from contacting you. There are so many personalities, so many characters in life, different people, different mentalities, but always remember, “An Ugly Personality, Can Ruin a Pretty face” – UNKNOWN ——– So do yourself a favour, set yourself free and do not let anything get bottled up inside. You wouldn’t want to risk having a serious nervous breakdown now would you? Think about it!
So true, so very very true! I filter what needs to be filter and let other things out!
Well said, Talin! Many, on the other hand, have difficulty and fear about being direct even though you are wise to mention being respectful and kind. Honesty is sometimes thwarted by the fear of “losing love” and approval. You are so wonderfully fearless. Keep writing, keep talking!
Love,
Linda
That is all true, but sometimes telling people they are ‘doing wrong’ is not the right thing to do and can cause more hurt. Sometimes you just have to move on and let it go.
True
Reblogged this on AURORA MOREALIST ©2011 ~ Writer and commented:
Couldn’t resist reblogging, such valuable information. Thanks, Talin O. Great piece.
“Being sincere and respectful as you confront the person”. This is a good point, it helps you to hear their story too.
So true, so true.
… things that are unwritten should be let out in the open. Thank you for sharing this post!
Agree. It is fear that most people have of creating conflict. I know that this is one of my own weaknesses. I hate getting into conflict with others. Usually because I like to stay in control and when I start an argument sometimes the Hulk comes out, which I absolutely hate!
Your words ring true. Be amazing if everyone could use them wisely. But then the world would most likely be a very boring place if we all got along 24/7(and in no way am I condoning continued violence either!) Great post.
being straight forward is good, but how to be tactful about it could be a problem
So true the more you keep a grudge, the more you get hurt
Something I have been repeating all these years:
“The truth hurts, but it’s the lying that hurts more.”
It’s very hard to be honest with someone, without hurting them. A lot of my, so called ‘friends’, used that excuse “We didn’t tell you, because we knew you would act like this.” – No, I only acted-out in temper because it was kept from me for so long AND if I ever asked about it during that time (because I am usually very good at working stuff out; how people act, what they say) they would lie to my face so they could keep THEIR friendship with me – because I was such a push-over and allowed them to get away with it, in fear I’d be alone.
this is all true, because honesty and openness is always the foundation of insightful dialogue….
Yep, yep, yep. I hear you. I, too, prefer genuine to phoney-baloney.
Thank you for this great advice – always good to remember and something I will pass on to Tom as he could do with bearing this in mind sometimes! Thank you also for your kind words about our blog – I only saw them recently as the emails about comments go to Tom’s email. I continue to enjoy your positivity!
Nice post. I agree wholeheartedly, though this can be difficult for other people to understand. Some folks have a defensive position as their default and will take personally everything you have to say no matter how “nicely” you put it. Many sad, sorry souls have that “pull yourself up by the bootstraps” mentality, and see venting feelings as weakness and whining. You can’t let this deter you. People will respond the way people will respond. If we speak our truth and they freak out, that is not our responsibility. The shortcoming is in THEM- in their inability to care and connect with other people, their judgmental natures, insecurities, their inability to have compassion for others, or to love themselves. Thanks. I can tell I’d like you very much if we met. (A friendly reminder: be careful about correct usage of “there, their, and they’re”. You used the wrong one twice.) Keep up the thoughtful work!
I learned a long time ago keeping things bottled up is never good for us.
Annoying dongle, 3rd time lucky.
I’m with you on this. A flaw of my own I’ve identified in the past is bottling things up for too long, doing so really does become a drain and adds stress, but it is important to approach situations with some care.
Talin, you are absolutely correct. It is essential to communicate. Keeping everything bottled up is detrimental. If you cannot share what is in your heart, the relationship is far too surfacey and tenuous to tend and maintain. You always have such good posts. I am giving you the 7×7 blog award. The details, etc are here http://believeanyway.wordpress.com/2012/01/24/linking-and-surprised/
Hey Talin….
I have nominated you for the 7×7 link award….
check it out…
Me one of a kind….
This is a great post and what you have to say is so true. I believe that people really can become ill from keeping their feelings bottled up. Too much stress is hard on a body, for sure.
I shared your post via twitter a few minutes ago…thought other people should read this too.
I totally agree!
This is a lesson that I find myself having to learn over and over again – not to bottle things up. Thanks for the reminder.
It’s so true. It can be difficult, especially for people who don’t like confrontation or don’t want to go against the grain, but usually both parties end up appreciating the encounter, sooner or later!
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Very Wise Words…
Thank You ♥
This is such good advice. Thank you for posting this. Your heart is wise.
Take care
–Kerry-Ann
Hope your weekend is happy and uplifting. Take care!
There’s an awful lot of me – me – me in their Talin. It’s gonna be difficult getting your point across without upsetting the other party who may have different but valid strengths and values. Sometimes it’s easier to accept that we are not all the same and just let it ride. Life’s too short
good luck
Agree Agree Agree.. Spot on!